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Socialist Grocery


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Seven-panel "Socialist Grocery" comic in which a customer compares Sebastian to a more beautiful Statue of Liberty, after which Sebastian and his friend discover that Statue-of-Liberty Porn exists.


Transcription

Title: Socialist Grocery

[Panel 1]: Sebastian stands on a step stool next to a row of cashiers, holding up a circular sign that says “LINE.”
Narration: Our job gets so chaotic sometimes that we need someone to essentially act as a crossing guard.
Sebastian: Whoever’s ready to check out, please go to register 10!

[Panel 2]: Sebastian looks down and replies to a customer with shoulder-length wavy hair as they walk past Sebastian. Another customer with short wavy hair who is wearing their mask below their nose approaches Sebastian from the side to ask a question.
Wavy-haired Customer: Thank you sweetheart.
Sebastian: No problem, have a great day! Next customer!
Short-haired Customer: Excuse me. Miss.

[Panel 3]: Visible over Sebastian’s shoulder, the short-haired customer looks up and into Sebastian’s eyes, holding one finger up while they speak. Sebastian gazes neutrally
Short-haired Customer: Has anyone told you that you look like the Statue of Liberty, but more attractive?

[Panel 4]: Split panel shows Sebastian’s reaction play out, which is at first confused and in the next instant, thoughtful.
Sebastian: … Uh… I mean personally, I think she looks great.

[Panel 5]: Side view of the customer and Sebastian as they continue to converse. The short-haired customer’s hand is still raised, but Sebastian now has his hans in his pockets.
Short-haired Customer: Oh she does. I agree. That’s why it’s such a TALL compliment!

[Panel 6]: Close-up view of Sebastian, whose eyebrows have furrowed even more, and whose expression has shifted to one of bewilderment.

[Panel 7]: Sebastian sits curled up on a couch with his hair tied up, wearing a flannel and socks, facing a friend with wavy ear-length hair who is wearing a hoodie and sweatpants. The friend is looking intently at their phone as they speak to Sebastian.
Sebastian’s Friend: To answer your question, yes, I am finding a lot of Statue-Of-Liberty Porn. This IS thing, turns out.

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